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How not to feel guilty if the husband constantly shifts his responsibility to me?
First of all, your spouse cannot pass on his responsibility to you. You are probably talking about his obligations. Secondly, have you already reached an agreement and clearly defined obligations at this level? To whom and what is it decided to do? Your spouse should always be responsible for the consequences of their actions. If he does not want to do anything, it would be nice to check what lies behind his behavior. Maybe, because of his upbringing, he believes that all family worries should fall on the shoulders of the wife? Maybe he is afraid to be not up to par? Maybe he is afraid that he will annoy you and hear reproaches on your part? Maybe he’s not self-confident? Take advantage of this situation to communicate more with him.
Pay attention to your beliefs. Maybe you do not really believe in the ability of men to engage in family? Maybe you consider yourself responsible for the happiness of all home? To find out all this, ask yourself the following question: do you immediately consider yourself guilty if something goes wrong with your family members, in housekeeping, etc.? Your spouse has not accidentally attracted your attention. We feel the need to be surrounded by different people in order to know ourselves. I am sure that when you stop scolding your spouse and take a deeper look at yourself, then everything in your family life will change for the better.
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How not to feel guilty if the husband constantly shifts his responsibility to me?
- My husband and son wake up hard in the morning. I have to wake them several times. It ends up screaming them out of bed so that my husband is not late for work and his son goes to school. What should I do in order not to feel responsible for their delay?
Firstly, this is not your responsibility, and secondly, you need to assign this responsibility to them, telling them that from now on they will be responsible for the consequences of their choice. Currently, they have made the choice to send in the mornings, and you have decided to be responsible for the consequences of their choice, fearing what might happen to them. When they themselves have to answer for the consequences of their choice,
- When I go out alone or with my girlfriend, my husband always condemns me or pouts me. Sometimes I go out for a walk, and sometimes not. One way or another, I feel out of place. If I go out for a walk, I feel guilty. If I don’t go out for a walk, I feel miserable. I know that I succumb to guilt, but I can not help myself. What do i do?
It is clear that your husband only openly expresses what is already happening in you. He is part of you, which says that a good wife should not go out without her spouse. However, there is another part of you that sometimes wants to go out with someone else. Apparently, the first part is stronger and more often wins. Make contact with these two parts in you and ask them to agree and
- I had a lover for a short time, and I feel guilty for not renewing the conjugal relationship with his wife. I feel guilty for everything that was destroyed. How can I free myself from this guilt?
The relationship between your former lover and his wife does not concern you in any way. What happens between them has nothing to do with you. But, based on your scale of values, you tell yourself that it is not good to have a relationship with a married man. You must choose one of two things: either make sure that this does not happen again, because you feel guilty, or change your
- How can I feel happy if my spouse does not want to rise to my level of development?
Mutual respect is fine, but for me this is not enough. If your spouse does not want to work on himself in the same direction and in the same rhythm as you, then this does not mean that he has stopped in his development. It just does not develop as fast as you. No one in this world has the right to control the evolution of another. If you give up trying to force your husband
- What happens to a person if he is guilty, but does not realize himself in this report and does not consider himself guilty? Will he be punished? Will he reap what he sowed?
Laws apply to everyone regardless of whether we believe in them or not. For example, if someone passes a red light and tells the policeman that he does not know the law or that he does not believe in him, this dzhigit will still get a fine. The situation is exactly the same with spiritual laws - the law of karma or the law of cause and effect. If a person knows that he is breaking the law, and yet consciously
- What is the difference between feeling guilty and being guilty?
To feel guilty means to consider yourself guilty based on our own system of values, which, in turn, is determined by our beliefs. Most people tend to consider themselves guilty, although in reality they rarely are. This is because they forget to check if they really wanted to do harm. They decide they are to blame, so
- How to help a person who is going to get a divorce not feel guilty? This is a man who has been married for fifteen years and has two children of eight and fifteen years old.
First of all, did this person turn to you for help? This is the most important point that should be checked for any form of assistance relationship. You must also understand that only he himself can truly help himself. His guilt comes from his mental perception. He must choose whether he still wants to feel guilty or if he wants to
- How can I behave with a person who seeks to undermine my faith in myself and make me feel guilty for decisions that are difficult for him to take responsibility for?
The consequences of his decisions seem difficult to him, and he would like to blame me for them, as well as for everything that follows them and causes him concern. Example: a divorce initiated by him. From your question, I conclude that this gentleman decided on a divorce, but then it was difficult for him to come to terms with his own decision. It’s hard for him to take on
- How to help my children, my ex-husband and his girlfriend feel at ease at our meetings during the holidays, birthdays, etc.? I feel very at ease with his girlfriend, but as soon as we find ourselves all together, I feel awkward.
Have you asked your ex-spouse and your children if your feelings are true? If they say yes, if they really feel uncomfortable, do they want you to help them? I feel in you a woman who shoulders responsibility for the happiness of others. Have you made a commitment to ensure that they always feel
- How should one behave with a sick person who uses his illness in order to provoke self-love? I feel helpless because I want to help this man, but he does not believe in anything.
The previous answer extends to this question. Why does a person often feel the need to help others without thinking that this can harm another? A person who decides to help someone without thinking about what he can do is only think about himself. He needs someone’s positive result to feel his own worth. Therefore he
- I have a friend, he is going to get a divorce and feels very guilty. How can I help him?
First of all, find out if he wants help. If so, tell him about your new concept of guilt. Help him find out if he really is to blame, whether he is going to harm another, or if he simply expresses his limits in relation to the difficulties he is experiencing in a married life. Explain to him that breaking your limits in order to please someone
- I am a responsible person, and I believe that on my shoulders is too heavy a burden. What to do in order not to feel guilty when I can not cope with all the tasks?
Is the burden you feel a consequence of the fact that you have made too many commitments? Have you committed to yourself or to another person? Perhaps you feel responsible for the happiness of others? If the latter assumption is most likely, then in this book you will find a true definition of responsibility. If you took on too much
- If I allow my teenage daughter to walk late that evening and she suddenly becomes pregnant or addicted to drugs, I will feel guilty. What should I do? Maybe I'm too overbearing father?
Between us, tell me honestly: do you really believe that your daughter can get pregnant, or take drugs only late in the evening? You know very well that there is no logic in your words. 'Nevertheless, since you feel guilty, I advise you to speak frankly with your daughter about this. Share your feelings with her. Realize also that your feeling
- What if the husband does not strive for a healthy life, joy and love?
Even our joint trips with him are no longer pleasing me, I am experiencing severe mental pain. Probably one side of your “I” is negative, but you do not allow it to manifest. Do not you force yourself to be always positive and do you try to give the impression that you are swimming in happiness? If the views of the spouse do not coincide with yours and he does not hide it, then most likely you are not up to
- When someone turns to us for help, how to provide it and not feel responsible for the results?
I see that you do not want to feel responsible for the results obtained by another person, and this is very good. Half of your problem has already been resolved. True love lies in the desire to help, guide, advise others without any expectations, that is, without feeling responsible for the results. No one can control the whole sequence of steps leading to a certain
- Now I have a second husband. He is a little closed, because he is afraid that he will not take root in the new family.
New Roman "> I’m very frank with him and would like the same frankness from him. My ex-husband was a very jealous person with an excessive possessive instinct. He wanted me to be always with him. Because of this, I’m from him and My second husband is completely different. He is very independent, and it’s not easy for me. I’m indecisive: I don’t know which one I like best. First husband