Licensed books on medicine
<< Ahead || Next >> |
How not to feel guilty if the husband constantly shifts his responsibility to me?
First of all, your spouse cannot pass his responsibility on you. You are probably talking about his obligations. Secondly, has an agreement been reached between you and clearly defined commitments at this level? Who and what decided to do? Your spouse must always be responsible for the consequences of his actions. If he does not want to do anything, it would be nice to check out what lies behind his behavior. Maybe because of his upbringing, he believes that all family concerns should fall on the shoulders of his wife? Maybe he is afraid to be at a height? Maybe he is afraid that will annoy you and hear reproaches on your part? Maybe he is not confident? Take advantage of this situation to communicate more with him.
Pay attention to your beliefs. Maybe you do not really believe in the ability of men to engage in family? Maybe you consider yourself responsible for the happiness of all households? To find out all this, ask yourself the following question: do you immediately feel guilty if something goes wrong with your family members, your household, etc.? Your spouse did not accidentally attracted your attention. We feel the need to be surrounded by different people in order to know ourselves. I am sure that when you stop scolding your spouse and look deeper into yourself, everything will change for the better in your family life.
| << Ahead || Next >> |
| = Go to tutorial content = |
How not to feel guilty if the husband constantly shifts his responsibility to me?
- My husband and son wake up hard in the morning. I have to wake them up several times. It ends with the fact that I shout them out of bed so that her husband is not late for work, and the son is at school. What should I do so as not to feel responsible for being late?
Firstly, it is not your responsibility, and secondly, you need to place this responsibility on them, telling them that from now on they will be responsible for the consequences of their choices. Currently, they have made the choice to send in the morning, and you decide to be responsible for the consequences of their choice, fearing what might happen to them. When they themselves have to answer for the consequences of their choice,
- When I go out for a walk alone or with a friend, my husband always blames me or sulks me. Sometimes I still go out for a walk, and sometimes not. One way or another, I feel ill at ease. If I go for a walk, I feel guilty. If I do not go out for a walk, then I feel unhappy. I know that I give in to guilt, but I can’t do anything with myself. What do i do?
It is clear that your husband only openly expresses what is already happening in you. He is part of you, who says that a good wife should not go out without her husband. However, there is another part of you that sometimes wants to go out with someone else. Apparently, the first part - stronger and more often wins. Make contact with these two parts in you and ask them to come to an agreement and
- For a short time I had a lover, and I feel guilty that he did not renew his marital relationship with his wife. I feel guilty for everything that was destroyed. How do I get rid of this guilt?
The relationship between your former lover and his wife does not concern you in any way. What happens between them has nothing to do with you. But, relying on your scale of values, you tell yourself that it is not good to have a relationship with a married man. You must choose one of two things: either to make sure that this does not happen again, because you feel guilty, or to change your
- How can I feel happy if my spouse does not want to rise to my level of development?
Mutual respect is fine, but for happiness this is not enough for me. If your spouse does not want to work on himself in the same direction and in the same rhythm as you, then this does not mean that he stopped in his development. It just doesn’t develop as fast as you. No one in this world has the right to control the evolution of another. If you give up trying to force a husband
- What happens to a person if he is guilty, but does not give himself the report and does not consider himself guilty? Will he be punished? Will he reap what he has sown?
Laws apply to everyone, regardless of whether we believe in them or not. For example, if someone drives through a red light and tells the policeman that he doesn’t know the law or that he doesn’t believe in it, this jigit will still have a fine. It is the same with spiritual laws - the law of karma or the law of cause and effect. If a person knows that he is breaking the law, and yet deliberately
- What is the difference between “feeling guilty” and “being guilty”?
To feel guilty is to consider yourself guilty based on our own value system, which, in turn, is determined by our beliefs. Most people tend to consider themselves guilty, although in reality they rarely are. This is because they forget to check whether they really wanted to do evil. They decide they are to blame, so
- How to help a person who is going to divorce, do not feel guilty? This is a man who has been married for fifteen years and has two children, eight and fifteen years old.
First of all, did this person turn to you for help? This is the most important point that should be checked in any form of assistance relationship. You should also understand that only he himself can truly help himself. His guilt comes from his mental perception. He must choose whether he still wants to feel guilty or wants to
- How do I deal with a person who seeks to undermine my faith in myself and make me feel guilty for decisions that it is difficult for him to take responsibility for making?
The consequences of his decisions seem hard to him, and he would like to hold me responsible for them, as well as for everything that follows them and causes him anxiety. Example: a divorce, initiated by him. From your question, I conclude that this gentleman made the decision to divorce, but then it was difficult for him to come to terms with his own decision. It's hard for him to take on
- How to help my children, my ex-husband and his girlfriend to feel at ease at our meetings during holidays, birthdays, etc.? I feel very at ease with his girlfriend, but as soon as we are all together, I feel embarrassed.
Did you ask your ex-spouse and your children whether your feelings are true? If they say yes, if they really feel awkward, do they want you to help them? I feel in you a woman who shoulders responsibility for the happiness of others. Have you pledged to make sure that they always feel
- How should one behave with a sick person who uses his illness to induce love for himself? I feel helpless because I want to help this man, but he does not believe in anything.
The previous answer extends to this question. Why does a person often feel the need to help others without thinking that it can harm another? A person who decides to help someone, without thinking about what he can do, thinks only about himself. He needs someone's positive result to feel their own significance. Therefore he
- I have a friend, he is going to divorce and he feels very guilty. How can I help him?
First of all, find out if he wants help. If so, tell him about your new concept of guilt. Help him find out if he really is guilty, whether he is going to do harm to another, or whether he is simply expressing his limits in relation to the difficulties he is experiencing in a married life. Explain to him that violation of your limits in order to make someone happy
- I am a responsible person, and I consider that my burden is too heavy. What to do to not feel guilty when I can not cope with all the tasks?
Is the severity that you feel the result of having taken on too many commitments? Have you pledged to yourself or to another person? Perhaps you feel responsible for the happiness of others? If the latter assumption is most likely, then in this book you will find the true definition of responsibility. If you took on too much
- If I let my teenage daughter walk late in the evening and she suddenly gets pregnant or is addicted to drugs, I will feel guilty. What should I do? Maybe I'm too domineering father?
Between us, tell me honestly: do you really believe that your daughter can become pregnant, or take drugs only late at night? You know perfectly well that there is no logic in your words. “However, since you feel guilty, I advise you to speak frankly about this with your daughter. Share your experiences with her. Recognize also that your feeling
- What if the husband does not seek a healthy life, joy and love?
Even our joint trips with him do not please me, I feel a strong heartache. Probably, one side of your “I” is negative, but you do not allow it to manifest. Do you force yourself to be always positive and do you try to give the impression that you are bathing in happiness? If the views of the spouse do not coincide with yours and he does not hide it, then most likely you are not up to
- When someone turns to us for help, how to provide it and not feel responsible for the results?
I see that you do not want to feel responsible for the results obtained by another person, and this is very good. Half of your problem is already solved. True love is the desire to help, guide, advise others without any expectations, that is, without feeling responsible for the results. No one can control the entire sequence of stages leading to some
- Now I have a second husband. He is a bit closed, as he is afraid that he will not take root in the new family.
New Roman "> I’m very frank with him and would like the same frankness from him. My ex-husband was a very jealous man with excessive possessive instinct. He wanted me to always be with him. Because of this, I’m from him and She left. My second spouse is not at all. He is very independent, and it’s not easy for me. I hesitate: I don’t know which of them I like better. First husband