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How to explain to the person you previously needed that now you can do without him, but so that he does not feel rejected?


First, you need to check whether this person really feels rejected, or whether you are afraid that he will feel rejected. This fear of rejection may only really exist in your imagination. Just tell him that you thank him for all the help he has given you, but that now you feel strong enough to stand on your own to manage with your own strengths. Ask him how he feels if he is upset that you want to act on your own. Call him in for a conversation and listen carefully. Very often, listening carefully to another person, we find that the situation is different from what we imagined.

Do not forget that if this person so persistently sought to help you, that means he loved you. Do not rush, try to feel the love in this person. If he says that he feels good only when he helps others, then he thereby recognizes his dependence on you. There are people who do not love themselves enough and seek their love, trying to benefit. When they prove useful, they have the feeling that they are loved. You need to show sympathy for this person and decide that from now on with the services that he wants to provide you, you will sometimes say yes, and sometimes no. You are free to decide what suits you best.
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How to explain to the person you previously needed that now you can do without him, but so that he does not feel rejected?

  1. I live alone. Very often I get up at night to eat a piece of cake with a glass of milk. I don’t understand why at the same time I tiptoe and try not to make noise. Maybe because I feel guilty?
    You have already answered your question. Sure, you consider yourself very guilty. This guilt is so deep in you that, contrary to your will, it affects your behavior. It probably seems strange to you that you behave as if you are living with other people. Who were you afraid when you were a kid? Who told you that you shouldn’t do this or say it, and who told you that you
  2. How should one behave with a sick person who uses his illness in order to provoke self-love? I feel helpless because I want to help this man, but he does not believe in anything.
    The previous answer extends to this question. Why does a person often feel the need to help others without thinking that this can harm another? A person who decides to help someone without thinking about what he can do is only think about himself. He needs someone’s positive result to feel his own worth. Therefore he
  3. How to help an old person who wants to regain the health that he had at the age of twenty? He has been paralyzed for four years. Are doctors to blame?
    When a physical problem arises, then the doctors are not always guilty of this. I admit that medical errors occur and that some doctors negligently harm their patients, moreover, not only physically, but also at other levels. Mistakes can be made in all professions: it is human nature to make mistakes. This is also part of the overall plan. The doctor needs to carry his share
  4. How can I behave with a person who seeks to undermine my faith in myself and make me feel guilty for decisions that are difficult for him to take responsibility for?
    The consequences of his decisions seem difficult to him, and he would like to blame me for them, as well as for everything that follows them and causes him concern. Example: a divorce initiated by him. From your question, I conclude that this gentleman decided on a divorce, but then it was difficult for him to come to terms with his own decision. It’s hard for him to take on
  5. As a mother, I feel responsible for feeding the children well, because I believe that they are still too small to take care of their own health. I have three children aged four to nine years. Do not you think that this responsibility lies with me?
    You are not directly responsible for the health of your children. As a mother, you must be responsible for the consequences of giving birth to children - that is, to monitor their material needs, to help them learn, to transfer their knowledge to them, to give them love, and all this to the extent that you can do. On the other hand, you cannot know in advance what the results will be. You can cook the most
  6. My husband has a panic fear of being without money. And this despite the fact that he and I have a permanent job. What to do and what to tell him?
    Have you tried just talking to him about what's bothering him? You asked him if he had any questions about this, did he think about it? Was his father afraid to be left without money? If so, what did your husband as a child feel when he saw this fear of his father? Did he judge the father? When we condemn our parents, we ultimately become just like them. It would be nice to give
  7. I am a responsible person, and I believe that on my shoulders is too heavy a burden. What to do in order not to feel guilty when I can not cope with all the tasks?
    Is the burden you feel a consequence of the fact that you have made too many commitments? Have you committed to yourself or to another person? Perhaps you feel responsible for the happiness of others? If the latter assumption is most likely, then in this book you will find a true definition of responsibility. If you took on too much
  8. What happens to a person if he is guilty, but does not realize himself in this report and does not consider himself guilty? Will he be punished? Will he reap what he sowed?
    Laws apply to everyone regardless of whether we believe in them or not. For example, if someone passes a red light and tells the policeman that he is not aware of the law or that he does not believe in him, this dzhigit will still get a fine. The situation is exactly the same with spiritual laws - the law of karma or the law of cause and effect. If a person knows that he is breaking the law, and yet consciously
  9. How do I behave with my spouse if he often has bouts of melancholy that reach a panic state?
    I’m afraid that such a state of mind can seriously affect me. This situation affects you because it annoys you and because you refuse to understand the condition of your spouse. A person becomes depressed when he has low self-esteem. You have undoubtedly noticed that at times of crisis a spouse complains of pain in the heart. The heart contracts and the body
  10. What you can already - 2, just as long as you don’t know about it or pretend you don’t know how
    You can reflect on the topic of "Signs." Such thoughts pushed me to such magic here. Several black cats live in our huge yard - at the same time I saw three. Their impudence was unlimited, and the force of influence on my life was amazing to the ability to ruin everything on the day when a black cat came across me on the road. And so it went on until I became
  11. My husband and son wake up hard in the morning. I have to wake them several times. It ends up screaming them out of bed so that my husband is not late for work and his son goes to school. What should I do in order not to feel responsible for their delay?
    Firstly, this is not your responsibility, and secondly, you need to assign this responsibility to them, telling them that from now on they will be responsible for the consequences of their choice. Currently, they have made the choice to send in the mornings, and you have decided to be responsible for the consequences of their choice, fearing what might happen to them. When they themselves have to answer for the consequences of their choice,
  12. How can a small child be held responsible for his illness, especially in infancy, when he cannot reap what he still did not have time to sow?
    We must remember that even if the soul has a new body, this does not mean that it cannot be old. If you wear new clothes all week, this does not mean that your age is the same as that of these clothes, right? This also applies to humans. The body is the clothing of the soul, its shell, its vehicle for movement in the physical world. When an infant or young child is sick, especially if the disease
  13. When someone turns to us for help, how to provide it and not feel responsible for the results?
    I see that you do not want to feel responsible for the results obtained by another person, and this is very good. Half of your problem has already been resolved. True love lies in the desire to help, guide, advise others without any expectations, that is, without feeling responsible for the results. No one can control the whole sequence of steps leading to a certain
  14. Currently, I have a friend whom we have been dating for a year, and I am ready to make a commitment to maintain relations with him on a long-term basis. But he says that he’s not ready, that he’s afraid to make a commitment.
    You say that we reap what we sow. Why is this happening to me, because I am the type of woman who easily makes a commitment? Moreover, this is not the first time this has happened to me. And it was difficult for other people to make a commitment to me. You must ask yourself the following question: what makes me want so much to make a commitment? Maybe you are this
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