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When I, the mother of the family, allow the children to take responsibility, I get the feeling that I am an indifferent mother who does not give a damn about her children. I am afraid that they will also judge me when they grow up. What is the reason for this fear?


First of all, ask your children to give you their definition of indifference. Here is my definition: an indifferent person is a person who does not care about anything, who does not feel anything and who is not touched by others. Do you really consider yourself an indifferent mother? Do you really believe that? Teaching your children to take responsibility is the best gift you can give them, the most beautiful inheritance you can bequeath to them.
An indifferent mother would say to her children: “From today I want you to become responsible people, that is, that you make your own decisions. Decide how you want, do what you want, return home when you want, go to school, if you like it, eat what you want, I wash my hands. These are your decisions, and you will be responsible for their consequences. ” But that means going to the other extreme.
The mother, who teaches her children to take responsibility, continues to lead them, give them advice and recommend to them what, in her opinion, will be useful to them, adding: “I give you the best from myself, from that what I know and what I believe.
Now you have to make your own decisions. You are free to make decisions regarding your studies, your nutrition, your clothes and your future. ” It is important that your children feel that you are worried about their happiness, that you are interested in them and their well-being.
If they choose the path of suffering with which you do not agree, then you have nothing to do with it. You can express your disagreement to them, your sadness, your chagrin, but always do it without expectations. They cannot consider you indifferent. On the contrary, they will feel your sincerity and will gladly accept the space and freedom that you offer them. However, remember that what you call the path of suffering is not necessarily so for them. Thanks to your experience, they will naturally adhere to the concept of responsibility, and this is the most important condition for building a happy life.
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When I, the mother of the family, allow the children to take responsibility, I get the feeling that I am an indifferent mother who does not give a damn about her children. I am afraid that they will also judge me when they grow up. What is the reason for this fear?

  1. As a mother, I feel responsible for feeding the children well, because I believe that they are still too small to take care of their own health. I have three children aged four to nine years. Do not you think that this responsibility lies with me?
    You are not directly responsible for the health of your children. As a mother, you should be responsible for the consequences of giving birth to children - that is, to monitor their material needs, to help them learn, to transfer their knowledge to them, to give them love, and all this to the extent that you can do. On the other hand, you cannot know in advance what the results will be. You can cook the most
  2. It’s hard for me to accept the idea that we choose our parents. I read about this in your first book and I must admit to you that I still can’t understand this. I am an adopted child and I always want to see my real mother. Why did I choose a mother who decided to leave me?
    To learn to love despite being abandoned. Since we always reap what we sow, an abandoned child is usually a soul who somehow abandoned her child in her previous life. Apparently, this is your case. Forgiving your biological mother that she left you, you automatically forgive yourself. To do this, you need an open heart, a lot
  3. At present, I have a friend whom we have been dating for a year, and I am ready to make a commitment to maintain relations with him on a long-term basis. But he says he’s not ready, that he’s afraid to make a commitment.
    You say that we reap what we sow. Why is this happening to me, because I am the type of woman who easily makes a commitment? Moreover, this is not the first time this has happened to me. And it was difficult for other people to make a commitment to me. You have to ask yourself the following question: what makes me want so much to make a commitment? Maybe you are this
  4. I am an unmarried woman and live alone. My elderly parents often get sick. My mother calls me selfish when I refuse to come to her as soon as she needs help. Am I responsible for my parents? Do I always have to help them?
    Your heart knows the answer to this question, but your mind disputes it. No child is responsible for the happiness or well-being of their parents. However, a certain part of you believes that you are responsible for them, and it is quite possible that you yourself consider yourself selfish. You are undoubtedly influenced by your parents, who believe that a good, appreciative daughter owes,
  5. I believe that giving birth to children is a big responsibility. It can even be called a lifetime contract. When I think I can hurt them, I feel bad. What do I need to do to think differently?
    Change your beliefs. Firstly, when you decide to have a baby, you should not think that you are responsible for his happiness. Your first motivation should be the desire to enable the soul to return in order to be embodied. It is a gift of self. Then, to continue your growth, you must learn to love this soul that has chosen you. Having a baby is
  6. I am a responsible person, and I believe that on my shoulders is too heavy a burden. What to do in order not to feel guilty when I can not cope with all the tasks?
    Is the burden you feel a consequence of the fact that you have made too many commitments? Have you committed to yourself or to another person? Perhaps you feel responsible for the happiness of others? If the latter assumption is most likely, then in this book you will find a true definition of responsibility. If you took on too much
  7. I had a lover for a short time, and I feel guilty for not renewing the relationship with his wife. I feel guilty for everything that was destroyed. How can I free myself from this guilt?
    The relationship between your former lover and his wife does not concern you in any way. What happens between them has nothing to do with you. But, based on your scale of values, you tell yourself that it is not good to have a relationship with a married man. You must choose one of two things: either make sure that this does not happen again, because you feel guilty, or change your
  8. How can I behave with a person who seeks to undermine my faith in myself and make me feel guilty for decisions that are difficult for him to take responsibility for?
    The consequences of his decisions seem heavy to him, and he would like to blame me for them, as well as for everything that follows them and causes him concern. Example: a divorce initiated by him. From your question, I conclude that this gentleman decided on a divorce, but then it was difficult for him to come to terms with his own decision. It’s hard for him to take on
  9. What to do with people who do not want to help themselves, but prefer to scold others for their difficulties and illnesses? What if they get angry when they are given tips and advice?
    When such a person appears in our environment, this means that we ourselves must learn not to interfere in our own business and accept these people as they are, recognizing their right to be who they want to be. They have the right to choose their own path. I understand that it’s not easy to watch how a person chooses a path full of difficulties and suffering. Often it's just impossible to understand
  10. When I go out alone or with my girlfriend, my husband always condemns me or pouts me. Sometimes I go out for a walk, and sometimes not. One way or another, I feel out of place. If I go out for a walk, I feel guilty. If I don’t go out for a walk, then I feel miserable. I know that I succumb to guilt, but I can not help myself. What do i do?
    It is clear that your husband only openly expresses what is already happening in you. He is part of you, which says that a good wife should not go out without her spouse. However, there is another part of you that sometimes wants to go out with someone else. Apparently, the first part is stronger and more often wins. Make contact with these two parts in you and ask them to agree and
  11. It seems to me that my husband condemns me whenever it comes to my attendance at a lecture at the Listen to Your Body Center.
    Beside him, I feel like I am not able to reason sensibly. He often calls me naive. What should I do? Your spouse only expresses what you think of yourself deep down. Have you ever thought that you are not judicious enough? Don't you think that naivety is a manifestation of a character weakness? Do you sometimes blame yourself for being too naive
  12. How can you say that everything that happens to us is caused by an internal cause? I stopped at a red light, and at that time another car hit me from behind. How can I be the cause of this?
    At present, due to our great lack of awareness, it is very difficult to know exactly the internal cause of each accident (or consequence) in our external world. Take an example of your accident. Even if your awareness is not enough to remember what you were thinking about at the time of the accident, or to understand the cause of the accident. I suggest you start your own investigation, starting from
  13. My husband has a panic fear of being without money. And this despite the fact that he and I have a permanent job. What to do and what to tell him?
    Have you tried just talking to him about what's bothering him? You asked him if he had any questions about this, did he think about it? Was his father afraid to be left without money? If so, what did your husband as a child feel when he saw this fear of his father? Did he judge the father? When we condemn our parents, we ultimately become just like them. It would be nice to give
  14. Any breastfeeding mother who thinks she has a cold may have mastitis.
    FOR PROFESSIONALS: HOW YOU CAN HELP Most mothers are now breastfeeding in a variety of circumstances, and they need the support of experienced professionals such as nursing nurses, pediatricians, family practitioners and medical assistants. We give tips on how you can help them. 1. Believe in breastfeeding. Faith is contagious. More you
  15. When mother is sick
    A common reason mothers stop breastfeeding is their illness, both protracted and short-term. Some mothers stop feeding their children, even because of a mild illness like a cold. However, the real need to stop breastfeeding is extremely rare. It’s far more dangerous for a baby to switch to artificial feeding than to continue to suckle
  16. When mother is hospitalized
    Most hospitals work great when it comes to meeting the needs of a sick baby who is breastfeeding. But when a nursing mother is in the hospital, it is much more difficult to put the mother and baby together. Of course, the most important thing for a child is to have a healthy mother for many years to come, but medical problems should not lead to separation from the breast. For
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