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My wife goes to work. She never loved doing household chores, I know that and always knew that. I also go to work. Since we got married, maintaining order in the house constantly falls on me. It starts to bother me. We both go to work, and how can I explain to her that for the maintenance of cleanliness in the house she bears the same responsibility as me?

Did you make a clear commitment before deciding to live together? Maybe you made a commitment to do household chores by telling her, for example: “No problem. Will I do this? And now you are responsible for the consequences of your decision. However, if at present it has become too difficult for you, you must tell your spouse about it. Ask her if she wants to find with you a solution that is suitable for both. Perhaps you can hire someone from the outside to clean the house?
On the contrary, if the obligation was not specific and you thought that you could change her position on this issue after getting married, then you allowed yourself to decide for it.
No one can, without consulting, make decisions for someone else.
Hence the importance of communication. Knowing that she did not like to do household work, you may have decided to do this first, in the hope that she would love you more? Whatever your situation, try to ensure that there are no ambiguities between you, talk together, without blaming and not trying to change each other. Just consult and find a new arrangement as a result to get out of the existing difficulty.
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My wife goes to work. She never loved doing household chores, I know that and always knew that. I also go to work. Since we got married, maintaining order in the house constantly falls on me. It starts to bother me. We both go to work, and how can I explain to her that for the maintenance of cleanliness in the house she bears the same responsibility as I do?

  1. In my family I do everything: home, food, children, their education, their education. I don’t understand why only I should deal with all this. My husband says that when a woman does everything, it’s in the order of things. But he is also responsible for this, right?
    It depends on the obligations that you together made before the birth of the children. Have you discussed the consequences of having children in your family? Who wanted them? Suppose you really wanted to have children, but your husband told you: “I do not want to have children, but if this is so important to you, then okay. You can have children, I do not mind, because you will deal with them. " If between you has been reached
  2. At work, I have a big burden of responsibility. I head the department, which employs 30 employees. And specific tasks are set for me. I must constantly monitor the implementation of these tasks. How can I be responsible for such a number of employees without experiencing stress and not considering it a heavy burden?
    First, you need to check if you have a clear commitment to your boss. Have you made a clear commitment to complete one or more tasks on a specific date? Are these tasks realistic? And if you do not fulfill the tasks set for you, what will be the consequences? Are you ready to take responsibility for them? Having a clear from the start
  3. Due to unsuccessful love, I developed a psychosomatic illness, namely urinary incontinence. How do I understand my responsibility for this and how to get rid of this disease?
    Start by agreeing that this physical illness is sent to help you understand that your reaction to unsuccessful love is not good for you. A responsible person is one who admits and acknowledges that his physical problem is caused by his way of being, by what he is experiencing internally. Incontinence is usually caused by loss of control on the physical and emotional.
  4. How to make it clear to my spouse that I am suffocating from his possessive feelings towards me? How to do this without hurting his pride?
    The first thing that catches your eye in your question: you want the spouse to understand something. You, no doubt, have a false idea that "to understand is to love." You believe that if you manage to carefully let him know that you are suffocating, he will love you more. You are deeply mistaken. And little here depends on what tactics you choose. You don't have to
  5. I would like to know what I can learn from my mother. It makes me experience emotions - in the sense that it always contradicts me. She is negatively inclined and always says that I will not be able to achieve success in the business I have begun.
    Judging by your question, I see that you blame your mother for your own emotions. I emphasize once again that a person cannot be held responsible for anyone's emotions. Only you are responsible for your emotions, that is, for your reaction to the words or deeds of your mother. You may not agree with what she tells you, but it’s important that you feel that she is acting like her
  6. The idea that I will definitely meet a man who is psychologically similar to my ex-spouse does not leave me. Is it so?
    The idea that I will definitely meet a man who is psychologically similar to my ex-spouse does not leave me. Is it so? You yourself said that once you met a person who looked like your ex-spouse. My husband was an alcoholic. So, am I destined to meet an alcoholic again? We are attracted to people with the same psychology, if there is a desire to complete what is not
  7. Recently I was robbed, and I do not understand how this can come from me, given that I have never stolen anything from anyone. Waiting for your explanation.
    Are you sure that you never took anything from anyone? Look at what bothers you the most about this paint. They often say to me: “What worries me most is that they invaded my personal life, that someone else was delving into my things.” If this is your case, are you sure that you have never delved into someone's personal life or did not want to do this? Or that they never stole
  8. I am one of those people who are always afraid to offend others. I agree too quickly when someone turns to me for help. Then I regret it and don’t know how to get out of this situation.
    You very quickly agree, for, as a generous person, you would like to help everyone. But, on the other hand, you understand that you often go beyond your limits. In helping others, you forget about yourself. You should learn to be free from your obligations. It’s good when you can make a commitment when you are able to make promises, but it’s very important to be able to get rid of your
  9. My husband has a panic fear of being without money. And this despite the fact that he and I have a permanent job. What to do and what to tell him?
    Have you tried just talking to him about what's bothering him? You asked him if he had any questions about this, did he think about it? Was his father afraid to be left without money? If so, what did your husband as a child feel when he saw this fear of his father? Did he judge the father? When we condemn our parents, we ultimately become just like them. It would be nice to give
  10. You said earlier that you can breastfeed even when you have completely stopped feeding. How to do it?
    Even if you stopped breastfeeding a few months ago, you will probably be able to squeeze a drop of fluid from your chest. Your milk system has not completely stopped. Resuming breastfeeding after you have stopped breastfeeding is called relaxation. Women who have never given birth have been nursing adopted babies, and this is called induced, or induced
  11. My husband is engaged in financial fraud, and their consequences naturally affect me: I live in constant anxiety, anxiety and fear.
    What do i do? If you and your spouse have completely different approaches to financial management, the main thing for you is to agree with him that you will independently manage your part of the money. Then you will have your own money, and you will manage it at your discretion, and the spouse will be able to do the same with his money. When each spouse tries not to interfere with the other “being” one,
  12. I really want to keep my current family, but I suddenly realized that my husband always decides everything for me and for the children.
    He is always right in everything, and I constantly suffer from the fact that I can’t achieve self-affirmation. What personality trait do I not accept? If the spouse always decides everything for you and does not take into account your opinion, then this means that you do not want to come to terms with your feminine principle. The same thing happens with your spouse. If he is convinced that his wife needs to be led, then this indicates that
  13. It’s hard for me to accept the idea that we choose our parents. I read about this in your first book and I must admit to you that I still can’t understand this. I am an adopted child and I always want to see my real mother. Why did I choose a mother who decided to leave me?
    To learn to love despite being abandoned. Since we always reap what we sow, an abandoned child is usually a soul who somehow abandoned her child in her previous life. Apparently, this is your case. Forgiving your biological mother that she left you, you automatically forgive yourself. To do this, you need an open heart, a lot
  14. I left my husband several times, because this is a real despot: he repeatedly beat me.
    I constantly think about our relationship with him. And now, once again, I left him, but I’m very afraid of meeting him or his call, because I know for sure: should he call me, and I will return. How is it that I constantly return to him, although I do not want to live with him? Most likely, two conflicting natures are fighting in you and you suffer from a split personality. One side of your
  15. How can you say that everything that happens to us is caused by an internal cause? I stopped at a red light, and at that time another car hit me from behind. How can I be the cause of this?
    At present, due to our great lack of awareness, it is very difficult to know exactly the internal cause of each accident (or consequence) in our external world. Take an example of your accident. Even if your awareness is not enough to remember what you were thinking about at the time of the accident, or to understand the cause of the accident. I suggest you start your own investigation, starting from
  16. Myth number 1. I have no time to look after myself, and in general it is harmful to the child
    This is nonsense! We come up with "rules for young mothers" like "you can not cut your hair or dye your hair," when laziness prevents you from elementary tidying up. Many girls have parents - grandparents, who may well sit with the child when you need to do a manicure. My parents are far away, I could afford a nanny, not an exorbitantly expensive service. In the end there are friends or
  17. For more than a year now, my mother has been lying in a psychiatric institute waiting for placement in a medical institution. Since I am the only person through whom she communicates with the outside world, I feel obligated to take care of her. Apart from the trust that she gives me, what gift can I get from this situation? Our relations have never been close, practically they simply do not exist.
    As for the gift, a hint about it is contained in your question. This is an ideal case to get close to your mother. However, how do you experience a sense of obligation towards her? Do you care for her from a pure heart? Would you feel guilty if you didn’t? No child owes his parents and vice versa. However, bonds between parents and children provide
  18. Someone told me that breastfeeding prevents pregnancy, but maybe it's all just talk?
    Exceptional breastfeeding reduces the risk of becoming pregnant. During the first six months, until you have started your period and while you are fully breastfeeding, day and night, you are 98% protected from pregnancy. This is tantamount to protection with other modern contraceptives. In the next section (“How does breastfeeding happen?") You will find out
  19. I convince myself that I am not leaving my husband just because he will disappear without me. Is this not stupid of me?
    Your husband, perhaps, will disappear without you, and you yourself thought about the fact that it would not be easy for you without him? Apparently, he is very dependent on you. It is possible that you are both interdependent. I can assume that you like to play the role of a mother in your relationship with him. When you are fully aware of your own addiction, sit down and calmly talk to him. Plan this conversation on
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