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Lesson 3. Tolerant communication.

Purpose: familiarity with the methods of tolerant communication.

In the conditions of modern civilization, the optimal form of tolerance is the expansion of one's own experience and critical dialogue. A person can see in a different position, in a different value system, not something that threatens his own position, but something that can help him solve problems that are urgent not only for him, but also for many people. This form of tolerance contributes to the development of personality, as a critical dialogue provides an opportunity to look at one’s own position from a different perspective. In whatever form tolerance is expressed, it always prevents any kind of violence, reduces intolerance and acts as a necessary condition and a reliable guarantor of the preservation of modern civilization in all its polyphony.

Exercise 1

The host invites the participants to join in pairs: one person acts as the offended, and the other as the offender. Participants recall and act out situations of gender conflict (for example, on the distribution of roles in the family). Using the scheme proposed below, the offended is trying to adequately get out of the situation.

The scheme for resolving a problem situation:

1. Start a conversation with a description of the situation that does not suit the offended.

2. Express feelings that have arisen in connection with this situation and the behavior of the offender in relation to the offended: "I felt uncomfortable ..."

3.
Offer the offender a different behavior that suits the offended.

4. If the offender changes his behavior, the offended will do so: "Then I will listen to your comments."

During the discussion, the group members express their opinion on whose solution to the problem was the most successful. The group concludes that the culture of behavior in the dispute forces us to listen carefully to the other side, to respect a different point of view.

Exercise 2

Explain to the group the difference between the self-utterance and the self-utterance. The use of the pronoun “I” in the speech makes communication direct, then the speaker takes responsibility for his thoughts and feelings: “When you come home late, I’m very worried.” Your saying is aimed at blaming the other person: "You came home late again." A person who is addressed using You-saying experiences negative emotions - anger, irritation, resentment. Using "I" allows the other to listen to you and calmly answer.

Scheme of I-utterance: "When ... (the action of another), I feel (me ...) ... I believe ...".

The facilitator asks the group members to make self-statements for the situations proposed by the training participants.

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Lesson 3. Tolerant communication.

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